There are a number of scurrilous rumours currently circulating Melbourne that suggest I may have been drunk last night. In that mix is a suggestion that upon stepping out of a maxi taxi in front of the Supper Club I stumbled forward and executed a combat roll onto the pavement. It has also been suggested that I allowed a girl to apply eyeliner and lipstick to my face in a bar in St Kilda. Again I reject these lies as nothing more than lies. I also do not care that numerous phone cam pics may or may not confirm all of the above.